ONE-LINERS ABOUT ECONOMISTS.
An economist is someone who tells you what to do with your money after you have already spent it.
Anyone who believes exponential growth can go on for ever in a finite world is either a madman or an economist.
Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.
Just remember, if you think you know nothing about economics, then you are ahead of economists, because what economists "know" is of negative value.
An economist is someone who didn't have enough personality to become an accountant.
If you were in the USA and economists were doctors, the courts would be full of malpractice suits.
99 percent of economists give the rest a bad name.
God created economists to make weather forecasters look good.
To an economist, real life is a special case.
An economist is someone who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.
Economists love poor people, that is why they support policies that increase their number.
Put all the economists in a straight line and they will never reach a conclusion.
Economists deserve our respect, if only for the great variety of opinions they hold.
Economists make economic predictions, not because they know anything, but because they are asked.
Economists are not being rational when they believe in rational behaviour.
If economists set out to maximize GNP, why don't composers maximize the number of notes in a symphony.
What do you call a pile of shit with a 40cent stamp on it? - An economic package.
The only true fiction is economic theory.
No amputee can become an economist because they wont be able to say "on one hand ..., on the other hand ..."
It is an economic sin for economists to lobby government and influence government policy.
The "market model" depends on full market information so that is why businesses that operate in the market protect their "commercially sensitive" information.
Economists have successfully predicted eight of the last three booms and nine of the last three recessions.
The purpose of economic theory is to make those who are comfortable feel comfortable.
Economists have two insights; markets work, and markets fail.
Economists do not have an open mind; their brains would fall out.
The promotion of economic growth is simply a sophisticated way to steal from our children.
You will never meet the economist who admits his forecasts are totally wrong.
The crime of economists is not that they know too little about our economic system, but they think they "know" so much.
You will never meet the economist who has been sacked for giving bad advice.
The difference between mathematics and economics is that mathematics is incomprehensible, while economics just doesn't make any sense.
What economists manage to economise is reality, ethics, and equity.
Economists are economical, among other things, of ideas.
You will never see an economics textbook that uses real data to justify the supply and demand curves it contains.
There are three kinds of economists, those who can count, and those who can't.
Remember, it is Professors of Economics who give the least to charity in the University.
The main error of economics is its disrespect for facts.
It is economics students who are the most likely to cheat.
Every statement, in regard to economic affairs which is short, is a misleading fragment, a fallacy, or a truism.
Economics is the systematic complication of the simple truths of housekeeping.
An economist is a person whose trade is to do nothing and speculate about everything.
Economists know hundreds of ways to make love but don't know any women.
When economists agree, it is time to head for the hills.
Economist's talk should be cheap as supply exceeds demand.
Economists expect to be the last to be damaged by their policies.
An economist is someone who doesn't know what he is talking about - and makes you think it is your fault.
When economists says the evidence is "mixed", they mean that theory says one thing and the data says the opposite.
Its not easy being an economist, just imagine having to go through life pretending you know what M3 is all about.
Economists have their own computer virus: nothing works but the diagnostic software says that everything is fine.
All it takes to be an economist is an unshakeable grasp of the obvious.
In economics you can fool all the people all of the time ... without any effort.
Economic statistics are like a bikini, what they reveal is important, what they conceal is vital.
Economists carry their diplomas on their car dashboards so they can use the disabled car parks.
Economics isn't meant to make sense, its meant to make economists a living.
In econometrics, 2 plus 2 equals five for large values of 2.
The purpose of learning about economics is to avoid being deceived by economists.
Economics is the only field in which it is possible for two people to get a "Nobel" prize for saying opposite things.
Economists have the least influence on policy where they know the most and are in agreement; they have the most influence on policy where they know the least and disagree most vehemently
An economist is someone who gets rich explaining to others why they are poor.
If you tell too many fairy stories to your children they might grow up to be economists.
Economists are people who are too smart for their own good and not smart enough for anyone else's.
Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists.
People who say economics is a dismal science are only half right - economics is dismal but it is not a science.
Economists are the last group of professionals on earth who still believe in perpetual motion machines.
The worse the economy, the better for economists. (Zauberman's law)
Mathematics brought rigour to economics, but unfortunately it also brought mortis.
An economist is a person who when confronted with a 4 metre high wall, immediately assumes that he is 5 metres tall.
Economics is the only field where one can be respected without ever having been correct.
Economist's ideology changes slowly, funeral by funeral.
When confronted by a conflict between real life data and theory, an economist always backs the theory.
The one thing economists agree on, is that they are always in disagreement.
Economists have solved the unemployment problem - for economists.